today is the first day of sch for the new term.
other ppl from ntu and smu have alr been very busy with their assignments.
yet i'm still slacking my time away.
first day of sch.
realli no sch mood.
somemore today i'm onli having a lect.
but d lect is from 6 to 8pm.
more sian leh.
realli dont have the feeling of sch.

and the first 2 wks of sch is lectures onli.
no tutorials.
make my timetable even more slack for now la.
and after d first 2 wks, it's cny.
so for d whole of jan, it's like quite slack la.
hahaha.
i wonder if it's a gd thing anot.
slack for so long.

BUT. it's not exactly slacking also.
cos there's alot of readings to do too.
and i went to look at my modules requirements for tis sem.
i'm like omg.
it's alot alot more than last sem la.
so tis sem, i think i'll just die la.
so mani things to do.
have to do preparation work also.
so it's not exactly slacking time for us.
slack onli for d no. of hrs in sch.
but for preparation work, it'll be alot alot.

sian. i dont like sch.
i dont like uni life.
oh ya. other than sch work, i still have to think abt my cca.
it'll make mi even busier la.
firstly, i have 2 cca.
den for 1 of them, i'm quite actively involved.
so far, i'm involved in 3 projects.
shld be considered quite alot alr.
for the other cca, i have some post too.
but somehow, there isn't alot of stuff for mi to do.
so it's still quite manageable.

tis sem is realli gonna be a busi sem.
wanted to give tuition.
but luckily, i didn't.
if not, i have my 2 cca, sch work and tuition.
for now, i have my sch work and cca.
hope tad i can manage.
sian.
not realli looking forward.


talking abt uni life.
i dont realli feel gd with my current life now.
as in, i'm not enjoying la.
who would enjoy studying?
i have lots of regrets.
regret saying wrong stuff.
regret doing wrong stuff.
regret making wrong decisions.
regret tis.
regret tad.
lots of regrets.
i'm having lots of regrets now.
and i'm realli realli regretting.

but it's too late alreadi.
i noe.
i hate regrets.
cos there can be no turning back.
the onli thing to do is to try to salavge d situation.
which is not easy for some cases.
so i can onli try my best.
but it's realli kinda hard.

though i do tell myself not to think abt it since it's d past alr,
i still can't get over it.
for minor stuff still okay.
for major stuff, it just bothers mi.
and it bothers mi forever.
i can't stop myself from thinking abt it.
and once i think abt it, i suffers.
cos i regret.
i hate myself from doing tad last time.
so i make myself suffer.
but it's just part of mi.
part of mi to think alot.

my life seems to be full of regrets.
sometimes, i do hate my life.
or i hate myself from doing so mani wrong stuff.
my life is full of ups and downs.
y cant it be smooth?
it would be much better.
and maybe i would be happier too.
how to stop my mind from thinking?
how to stop mi from thinking abt past stuff?
how to stop myself from having so much regrets?


sch is realli making mi sian.
hopefully, 2009 would be a better year for mi.
2009. dont make mi suffer.
i wish upon a star.
may the star bless mi.
may the star fulfill my wishes.

going to sch is gd in some ways also.
can meet up with frenz.
d feeling of bumping into frenz in sch is good.
and i miss some of d food in sch too.
so it still abt people and food.
not abt lessons.
hahahaha.
waking up for sch is another difficult chore for mi.
cos i'm too used to slping late and waking up late.
how m i going to slp early and wake up early?
pulling myself out of bed is another challenge tad i've to overcome.

early lessons, i hate u.
hahaha.
aniway, my lesson later today is evening.
shld i hate it too?
but i'll be driving.
so it wont give mi alot of problems.
will be seeing sarah and ruth later. =D

rained @ 1:54 AM